020: Just Shave Your Legs
"I gotta get my shit together!" Have you ever said that to yourself? If so, be sure to get on the waitlist so you are notified when doors open up again to my Get Your $hit Together (GYST) program.
If you want to join the GYST waitlist, head on over to eliseenriquez.com/GYST
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Who out there is a perfectionist?
I believe that while certain personalities can slip into and be troubled by perfectionism more than others, we all tend to be perfectionistic about something. For all of my enneagram people out there, I'm a type 9. The harmonizer. But right next to 9 is type 1. The perfectionist. And I have to say that my perfectionistic type 1 wing can be very strong at times!
Now, I know you must be scratching your head at the quizzical nature of this episode’s title. I won’t go into the details here, but if you tune in to the episode, you will hear the entire story. And yes, you’re allowed to laugh.
In the world of psychology, perfectionists are often identified as either healthy or maladaptive.
Healthy perfectionists challenge themselves by having high expectations, goals and standards. They get a very real sense of pleasure from the labors of their painstaking effort. When failures and challenges happen, they learn from them and stay engaged in an activity.
Then there are maladaptive perfectionists who set unrealistically high goals and standards. When they encounter failure/challenge they could go one of two directions:
- Become obsessed with the goal and increase their efforts OR
- Avoids the activity altogether.
In the past when my perfect days were at risk I've taken the path of becoming more obsessed with my goal. Making it happen no matter what...even if I didn't enjoy anything about it. But I've also been someone who avoids an activity altogether due to my perfectionism. I also spend most of my time in healthy perfectionism in the areas that matter.
Like many things, I think of perfectionism as more of a spectrum.
Most of the time when my perfectionism crops up, it's healthy...and sometimes...well, I already told you what that can look like.
For some things, perfectionism is worth the effort, the high standards, and occasional sacrifice to make something that is excellent, maybe even perfect. But sometimes, when your low-stakes perfect scenario starts to look not so perfect, it might be ok to go with “good enough”.
This is why one of my regular life reminders is "progress, not perfection".
One of the ways I help people get their perfectionism under control is to help them more clearly see the reality of their time and their commitments. We do this in my GYST program. If you want to join the GYST waitlist, don’t forget to head on over to eliseenriquez.com/GYST
Question of the week: What is ONE thing you could do a little less perfectly this week? You know, how can you just shave your legs?
I wanna know what that would look like. Share it with me over on Instagram.
PS: Perfectionism can sometimes be tangled up with anxiety and other mental health concerns. If you are ever feeling like your perfectionism is having a significant impact on your ability to function in and/or enjoy your daily life, reach out to a mental health professional. I'm a coach who has coaches and a therapist. It takes a village to keep this girl going, so don't hesitate to build your village too.
